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Reflections with Rachele 

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In the complicated dance of relationships, understanding and harnessing feminine energy is a powerful tool for creating deeper connections and more fulfilling partnerships. But what exactly is feminine energy, and how can you unblock it to enhance your relationships? In this guide, we'll explore the concept of feminine energy in relationships, uncover common blockages, recognize the signs of imbalance, and discover practical steps to unlock your feminine energy for healthier and more harmonious connections.

1. What is Feminine Energy in Relationships? Feminine energy is the essence of receptivity, nurturing, and emotional and sexual connection. It complements the masculine energy, which embodies strength, decisiveness, and action. In relationships, feminine energy often manifests as empathy, vulnerability, sensuality and the ability to connect with others on an emotional level. Knowing how to balance these energies is key to fostering a loving and harmonious partnership that feels in alignment for you both.

2. Why Do People Experience Blockages in Their Feminine Energy? Blockages in feminine energy can stem from societal pressures, past traumas, self-limiting beliefs or prolonged survival mode. Society sometimes portrays feminine qualities as weaknesses, leading individuals to suppress their natural tendencies. Past emotional, physical or sexual wounds can also create protective barriers, hindering the expression of feminine energy in relationships. As women, we often seek to feel safe before we express our femininity with another- due to these past pressures, yet that need for safety can also block femininity.

3. What Are The Signs of Blocked Feminine Energy? Recognizing the signs of blocked feminine energy is the first step toward healing. Common indicators include communication issues, emotional detachment, disconnection from your body, changes in libido, inability to express your needs and dissatisfaction in relationships. You might find it challenging to express your feelings or connect with your partner deeply, emotionally or intimately.

4. How Can One Unblock Their Feminine Energy? Unblocking your feminine energy is a journey of self-discovery and growth. Here are some practical steps to get you started:

  • Somatic Movement and Dance: Engage in somatic movement practices or dance to reconnect with your body and emotions. These practices can help you express your feminine energy through movement and enhance your mind-body connection.

  • Inner Child Therapy: Explore inner-child therapy & meditations to heal past wounds and address any emotional blockages affecting your feminine energy. Reconnecting with your inner child can be a powerful step toward emotional healing and growth- and shift how you date and relate to anyone!

  • Identify Limiting Beliefs: Recognize and challenge self-limiting beliefs that may hold you back from expressing your feminine energy.

  • Self-Care: Prioritize self-care to nourish your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Feminine energy needs to be self-oriented to be embodied. No part of self-care is selfish!

  • Tap Back Into Your Intuition: Learning to trust yourself is a key component to developing a strong and safe relationship with yourself so that you feel open to expressing your feminine energy.

  • Seek Support: Consider seeking guidance from a relationship coach (perhaps me) who can provide tailored strategies for unblocking your feminine energy.

5. The Role of Feminine Energy in Healthy Relationships Balanced feminine energy is a cornerstone of healthy, aligned relationships. It enhances communication, fosters emotional intimacy, and promotes overall satisfaction. When both partners embrace their feminine and masculine energies, they create a dynamic and harmonious partnership that thrives on mutual respect and understanding. If you feel like you need to plan, control or micromanage everything in your relationship, it may be time to step back and seek some support to receive the care you give him.

Unlocking your feminine energy is a transformative journey that can lead to more profound and fulfilling relationships. Recognizing and addressing blockages opens the door to deeper emotional connections and a more harmonious partnership. As a relationship coach, I support you on this journey of rebuilding your relationship with yourself and within your relationship. If you're ready to unlock your feminine energy and enhance your relationships, I got you. I've been in your shoes, and learning the work I teach has transformed my physical, mental, spiritual and emotional health! Together, we can create a path to lasting love and connection.

Things that your past traumas or triggers could consider a dating red flag:

  • They do not remember when to text you when you requested they do

  • They say " I'm not ready" but not breaking up with you

  • A shift in their sex drive

  • You're attracted to them most of the time but when you feel calm you get bored.

When you don’t feel safe, you look for continued proof that the person you’re with is not safe too. It's important to realize that safety comes from WITHIN. Until you chose to heal with a coach or therapist when you are single, you will keep repeating the patterns in your nervous system from your past that create triggers for you.

So let me debunk these few statements:

  • If they don’t text you when you asked, it could simply be absent-mindedness, they’re busy, or you didn’t communicate how important this need was of yours. If you want to continue to date this person, it's worth learning how to regulate your nervous system when they don’t text back right away

  • If they aren’t ready but they aren’t ending it, that doesn’t mean they’re not worth dating. Instead of getting scared, ask them why they’re afraid. Talk to them and uncover why they might be feeling overwhelmed. Often there are a lot of decisions based on assumptions in early dating. If you want to see where it goes, hold space for their feelings without taking it personally.

  • If your sexual chemistry has changed, this isn’t always about you or your relationship. There are many external contributing factors as to why this could be happening such as stress, health issues, emotional blocks, self-worth, hormone health, and grief…just to name a few. TALK about this with your partner and ask them what they need more of!

  • CALM is safe. You might not be familiar with feeling this way with someone before. But if you’re noticing the itch to create drama or you’re feeling bored when they’re not actually boring, it may be because your nervous system is used to more chaos and drama. STICK this one out, look at how your body wants to create stress and work with an external source (this could be me) to help you process what you’re feeling in your body.

Triggers and trauma are something we ALL have. These things shape how you see the world around you, especially your relationships until you heal your reactions.

The main thing I invite you to consider; sometimes, someone's behaviour isn’t because of YOU. Check-in and talk to the person you’re getting to know. You never know how healing a particular person can be for you…

Have you ever left because of these issues? Do you struggle to know if it's a genuine red flag or if your trauma acting out? Let me know in the comments.

Updated: Mar 13

In the world of self-help/wellness, there are two categories to support your mental health:

Category 1 includes: Therapists, Counsellors, Psychologists

Category 2 includes: Coaches, Mentors or Consultants

As someone who has training in both worlds, I'll do my best to articulate the difference between both for you and share the benefits of knowing your options. F

Therapy is for those who want to unpack their past hurts and wounds, process emotions and have space held for them. Sadly, therapy can sometimes be a never-ending loop of crisis regulation rather than any goal setting or momentum forward. I have heard many clients share stories with me about how they quit therapy when they started to "feel good" because their therapist didn't guide them to understand what could truly support them in improving their life. Many don't realize that feeling good is simply a baseline and this is where the true work of change begins!

In therapy, often what ends up happening is: a loop of crisis —> receive support/listening —> emotional regulation --> Stop therapy —> Back to therapy when a crisis arises again. This is how people stay STUCK.

What most don't realize is that there are a few steps missing in the healing process and this is where coaching comes into play:

Start with a crisis and/or realize you want to make a change in your life—> receive support throughout the change process —> emotional regulation --> set goals —> support for the nervous system when breaking habits --> learn new ways to reach goals —> receive accountability — >change your life!

This is why working with a therapist who is trained in coaching a well can truly support ALL your needs. (Me!)

For me, my goal is never to keep clients seeing me for years and years. My goal is to always propel them forward and empower them to live the life of their dreams!

And this is why I personally have chosen to switch from therapist to coach. For me and my practice, it is much more in alignment with my values. I have heard horror stories of other counsellors and therapists simply listing to clients vent for 1 hr and then giving zero guidance or tools to cope while seeing them for years and years with zero changes made. This is all too common, which is why many therapists themselves are burnt out and are unable to provide grounded support.

The additional piece that should be noted is that anyone with letters behind their name (most therapists have this) practices under a governing body and abides by their code of ethics. This, though many assume, is NOT indicative of how qualified someone is to support you. ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUT when you're deciding who to work with. However, coaches are not regulated and can sometimes do more harm than good, if not qualified to support a client through trauma, for example, or if they don't understand their scope of practice and are leary to refer their clients to others.

I, personally, have created coaching programs that mix therapy tools and trauma support alongside coaching strategies that time and time again have proven to support many of my clients. I do not have one set plan for every single person I work with as much of my work is curated for the client and their specific needs.

All of my training as a therapist and coach has supported me in being client centred, which means that YOU drive the car but I hold the map. I am in the passenger seat and I know where we are going but I empower you with the gas and the breaks. As a coach, I am here to guide you and empower you to find your answers while teaching you tools to keep you on your path.

Now if you've ever questioned the heck is coaching so much more expensive than therapy, let me tell you from personal experience- coaching is WAY more involved with the client relationship in between sessions, coaching requires marketing, promoting, social media, content creation, course creation, and many many more behind the scenes admin components that traditional therapists do not need to do. In addition, a good coach will be there to hold your hand through making big changes because they know takes support to shift and grow. I personally connect with my clients via Voxer (a voice and text app) when they are in crisis, going into having that tough conversation or are working to shift a habit that no longer serves them. We make changes during the moment it is happening! As a therapist, I was not allowed to do this for my clients, based on the code of ethics I was a part of, which, for me, was a huge reason for me to shift to becoming a coach.

A good coach (and or therapist) will also be mindful not to be working with you in burn out. I treat all my clients like VIP's because they are. When I was a counsellor I often would try to see 5-6 clients per day and holding that much space is exhausting for the best of us. You wouldn't believe how many folks out there are in burn out but need the finances so they continue to see clients while offering terrible support- even unhealthy advice at times.

On top of this coaching WILL get you to where you want to go. When we work together you and I BOTH have the same goals and intentions and so you will most certainly experience change if you dedicate your time and energy towards YOURSELF and your journey. Successful people have coaches in their corner.

I want to also mention that coaching is not just for businesses. Many people assume coaches are for elite folks in business when in fact, most of what I support my clients with is emotional tools, relationships, and spiritual components alongside learning how to find their authentic voice/alignment.

Lastly, don’t worry if you’re not sure what your goals are, the goal can simply be “I want to enhance my life” or I” want to grow.” These are perfect starting points and it is my job to inquire as to what areas in life aren’t working for you and see how we can make you feel more at ease as you step into your power.

Are you curious to learn more about how we can work together?

I work with female clients and couples and I do Human Design Readings.

Check out my services page for more details.

In summary, if you’re wondering what the right path for you is, do I see a therapist or coach? There is no wrong choice. Both Can support your needs. At the end of the day I strongly invite you to ask questions to your coach or therapist when you book your discovery call. Ask them what their training is and see if it can support your need and be specific. If you want to work through your childhood, relationships or any trauma then you will want to find a coach or therapist that is legitimately trauma informed.

Please note: if you struggle with a severe mental health disorder and it impacts your day to day life- may want to work with a therapist who is trained in your diagnosis.

I hope this helps you in understanding further what your needs are!

Feel free to comment below if you’ve got any questions.

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